This morning I want to share a friend’s story, she sent it to me with permission to share. I ask that you read it with great care and that you hear her words. She is a very dear friend of mine, she has one of the biggest hearts, she is fun, positive, silly, and is strong. I am so honored that she would share it with me, and that she has been reading for #NOMOREWeekand that is why she said I could share. That is the power of these conversations, because everyone deserves to be heard, believed, cared for, and loved. Here is my wonderful friends story as to why No More matters:
I have never really told anyone my story. Frankly, I never really even testified against the person that hurt me, sure, I told the people that needed to know. But after I realized what was going on, that I was going to have to speak, I was too afraid. Even now, just telling you is terrifying. But I love you and am inspired to tell you.
Like it was yesterday. I remember sitting in the shower afterwards…. watching all the evidence swirl down the drain. The burning not only in my groin, but also in my head. I was 13 the first time he hurt me, 15 the last time, I told him I would tell everyone if he didn’t leave me alone, I never really did. I left out so much in my testimony. I was 16. I lived in a small town and was so afraid of the world. Boy was I right.
I let go and gave my self to so many after that. All I wanted, was to be wanted. Not realizing that is exactly what He died for. For me to know I’m so loved. But the world I lived in told me I was ugly, ruined, and that no one wanted me. The noise was so loud. I spent over 10 years listening to that noise, using drugs and alcohol to numb and treat the symptoms. I haven’t done any of that in years. But sometimes, I still struggle with that hurt, and it is so hard to not call the drug dealers or stop by the store on my way home from anywhere.
Then I hear it.
This still voice. Quietly telling me I am a masterpiece, that I was wonderfully and fearfully made. I was made to be a lion, that no matter how dark it gets, He is there.